Does she belong to any group?

Friend 1 : Look at her. She is sitting alone.

Friend 2 : Poor girl

1: Doesn’t she belong to any group?

2: No. I don’t think. She is always alone. Poor  girl.

1: May be she is weird or dumb or maybe she is not able to fit in.

2: Maybe. Poor  girl.

                Why is it so important that we belong to some group? Why is it so important that in order to be socially accepted we need to roam around with a group of people. Why is a person looked down at because he/she does not have a friend circle to roam around with? We assume that a person is less talented or that he/she is not cool enough to fit in.

What happens most of the time?

In order to be accepted in some group, we start changing ourselves, we start behaving in a different way. We might not agree to such a behaviour but in order to get some attention we behave the way our friends behave. We start saying things they want to here and not what actually needs to be said.   And because of this our individuality starts to get lost somewhere.

It all starts from school. Our parents tell us to make friends good at studies. In college we are expected to make high achiever friends. In office, friends that are very influential and one that are capable to take us up there. We try to fit in with such people inspite of knowing the fact that we are not comfortable with them.

But what after all this?

We almost die behaving in a way the society wants us to. And then what do we do? We give our kids the same advice of belonging to a particular friends circle and never be alone. We also advice them on what kind of friends to pick. Smart. Intelligent. Good at studies. The others just become worth nothing according to them.

They say a person goes through peer pressure only in their teen years. But the reality is that however old we get peer pressure will never leave us. Its upto us to make our choices . To listen to the soft but honest voice of the conscience or the loud and pretentious voice of the society.

It is not wrong to be alone because

 alone is not the same as lonely.

Note: These are just my personal thoughts and not intended at anyone. You may or may not agree to what I say. That is completely your discretion.